*For privacy reasons the names of those mentioned have been changed*
You never really know what type of impact or what type of impression you are leaving on a person. Ultimately, God is the only one who knows.
With that being said, I want you to think about it for a moment...
And another...
I want you to really ponder how many people you encountered just today. How many of those people did you interact with? How many of those people did you notice? How many of those people didn't you notice?
As I reflect, I am positive I will not remember every encounter I had today, but I will share with you some of what I do remember...
I do remember how my patient's mother deeply processed every single word that came out of my mouth as I explained what I was about to do to/for her baby girl. I do remember the way she smiled in gratitude every time I offered to get her something to drink.
I do remember lending a helping hand to the nurse whose day was just a bit busier than mine.
I do remember the way a mother collapsed into a chair after walking back to the room of her lifeless child. I do remember praying as hands were laid on her.
I do remember Dr. Smith walking out of the room and kneeling in front of this mother saying, "We did everything we could do..."
I do remember the small huddle of nurses standing in the hallway with tear stained eyes as I walked over to give a hug.
I do remember hearing teamwork in action, "Two minutes! Switch."
I do remember talking with unfamiliar faces in the elevator on my way to lunch.
Today was one of those "bad PICU" days. I started off the day on a positive note. I was happy to be back at my home hospital. Happy to be working with a team I know and love. However, after updates from night shift, reality hit me... I'm in a place that no one wants to come to. I'm in a place where kids often leave in body bags.
What? Did she just say body bags? Yes, that's what I said.
This is my reality folks, and that was the short filtered version.
I'm sure you're asking yourself the same questions I have asked myself, "How in the world did I get here?" "How can this be my calling, Lord?" "How can I ever find the strength?"
And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. ThereforeI am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10
God is exactly how I got here. I don't know about you, but I've walked down my own path several times. I've tried to figure things out alone. I've tried to plan things by myself. Let me tell you a truth... I didn't get very far. It was as if every situation turned into a disaster. However, in 2009, God was making moves. I was fresh on the market! Pennsylvania's newest nurse at your service! I wanted to take a job close to home, live with my parents and save money. Notice the use of "I" in the previous statement. I think God had a bit of a chuckle when He heard my plan because He straight up shut me down. He closed every door even remotely close to anything that "I" had planned.
"Hershey?" I thought, "It sounds nice, but that's so far away!"
For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.
Jeremiah 29:11
He opened one door.
That door was not the one I wanted. "It's not going to work God, I just know," I said sarcastically in my head. I even had every intention to stay a year "get my experience" and move on.
My parents were even skeptical on how I was going to make it work, especially since I had to start paying back student loans.
Well friends, my parents were wrong and so was I.
Five years later, I am still a part of Hershey and Hershey is very much a big part of me.
I'm so thankful to this day that I stuck with God's plan. It has changed my life. A simple move two hours north to the small town of Hershey changed my life. I have encountered countless blessing after blessing. Not to mention, I LOVE the hospital and all of the people that I work with.
Now that I am a travel nurse, I am able to look back and realize just how blessed I was to be able to learn in an institution that holds one of the highest standards of care I have ever come across. This is where I learned how to be a nurse, which in itself is the greatest blessing of all.
I had a special thanks out today on Facebook for my preceptors. I'm not sure if you know this or not, but once you graduate from nursing school, you're not completely done. Part of my job was to complete a 6 month ICU internship before I could "fly solo" as a nurse. I wanted to thank them specifically for investing in me, believing in me, fostering growth in me, and being patient with me. I'm eternally grateful for the skill set that God has developed in me, and I especially want to recognize them for teaching me how to do it well.
This week has been exceptionally tough from all areas. If you are friends with me you may know that because I'm sure I mentioned it once or twice. :-)
This evening I found this comment on my Facebook post...
- "You may have been a "baby nurse" for **** and I many years ago, but we were the ones given the unique opportunity to help start you on your road in PICU. Without the gentle spirit, big heart, skilled mind, and great enthusiasm, we would have had an "average nurse." Instead we got to help an extraordinary person find her extraordinary calling. You bless those you care for and contact with more than your nursing skills - you touch them with your heart. So proud of who you are. And everyday I wish I could work there beside you again."
My heart was exceptionally happy reading this and I even cried a little. Those words were pure, kind and I don't even know if I fully deserve all of them. Here I was so wrapped up in the fact that my preceptors were a blessing to me, never did I ever think that I could have been a blessing to them. Wrong, yet again. God is making moves! We don't always see the impact that we are making on other people's lives, we just have to have faith and trust that He will use us in all of our weaknesses to bless others.
And that's what it's all about.
It's all about people.
So next time you're walking down the hallway say hello to the stranger that's passing you by, call that friend you haven't talked to in a while just to say hi, hold a hand, give a hug, share words of encouragement, send your mom flowers just because, send someone a birthday card, let someone know you were thinking of them today.
You don't know what God is doing. He can and will use your actions to capture the attention of others.
