Beautifully Broken

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you'd give anything to make it right or functional, but you just cannot figure out how to do that?  You think up many different ideas on what you might say versus what you should say.  The words are there but you can't organize them into coherent thoughts and points.  The words are there but you don't want to organize them into coherent thoughts and points.  You want to just hit the rewind button back to when things were normal and smooth sailing.  Sounds good right?  Rewind to a time when you had lots to say and it was easy and fun. Now, you're plagued with the thoughts of how your actions might be perceived, or how your communication will be misinterpreted and it slowly chips away at the fun-happy-care free person you used to be.   The harsh reality surrounding this is, you know that the only reason you feel this way is because you care.  "Oh," you'd think to yourself, "If only I could just let it go and adapt to the new normal this situation would be non-existent."

It's frustrating.  You want to stop caring, but you know that's not the right thing to do because being a christian means that part of the call is to be "all about people."  Your mind circles around the topic as if there is a broken record playing in your head.  It's almost as if you wish you could just pluck the situation out of your head, drop it off in the trash can, and never think about it again.  Wouldn't that be grand?

That's me.  Non-confrontational.

I like to be liked.  I like to be needed.  I like to feel appreciated. I like to feel cared about.  I like to feel as if I matter.  I like to feel as if I'm making a difference.  I mean, who doesn't? I don't like when things go awry and there are obstacles that make things complicated.  I would love everything to be honky dory in a place where everyone is happy.

Reality check.

That place doesn't exist on earth.  Not everything will turn out the way we want it to.  Here on earth we have disappointments, obstacles, heartbreaks, pain, and suffering, but along with all of that we can have pure happiness, pure peace and pure joy in Christ.

"'For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace shall not be removed,' says the LORD, who has compassion on you." Isaiah 54:10

"Christ the fountain of living water, and happiness drawn from Him can never fail." MB 28

This past week I've been trying to focus on that point.  It's a simple point yes, but sometimes it's those simple points that make the biggest impact.  While we live in such a horrible place where not everything is perfect and happy we still can find comfort in the promises of Jesus.

I've been reminding myself of this too...

Sometimes things are not meant to be as they were, sometimes things are meant to stay beautifully broken.

"If received in faith, the trial that seems so bitter and hard to bear will prove a blessing. The cruel blow that blights the joys of earth will be the means of turning our eyes to heaven." MB 20, 21